From Doing to Being

 

Over the decades, I developed the habit of devoting myself fully to achieving professional goals. After retirement, I feared that abandoning this habit would lead to personal decline. At the same time, I realized that maintaining such an intense drive would become a major source of stress. So, I took time to reflect on how I wanted to live the next chapter of my life. Eventually, I reached a conclusion: I needed to shift the center of my thoughts and actions from a life focused on “Doing” to one that also embraces “Being.” This change has allowed me to restore a sense of balance between body and mind—something especially important in my 60s. In Buddhist thought, “Doing” emphasizes actions and goal achievement, while “Being” emphasizes presence, acceptance, and the value of simply existing in the moment. Striking a balance between the two is vital. The more we lean into “Doing” and become attached to outcomes, the more suffering we experience when we fall short. In our younger years, we have the mental and physical resilience to endure such setbacks. But in our 60s and beyond, our capacity to absorb that strain diminishes. To preserve inner peace while still working toward meaningful goals, it becomes necessary to strengthen the Being mode—focusing on the process and letting go of excessive attachment to results. In my case, I still value having goals, even after retirement, but I now try to approach them with patience and a broader, long-term perspective. This mindset also applies to relationships. When we push others too hard or expect them to meet our demands, we are operating from the Doing mode. But by enhancing the Being mode—respecting others as they are and valuing their presence—we foster healthier connections and protect our own peace of mind.

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